Gillham Pack 19 - Calvin Read online

  “You’ll stop waiting, eventually.”

  Calvin smiled. “I’m starting to.”

  * * * *

  Calvin had to do puppy eyes at Dallas to be released from the infirmary, even though he was fine. He wasn’t sure why Dallas seemed to want to keep him under hand, but he relented only when Alex told him he’d stay with Calvin.

  Calvin waited until they stepped outside in the snow to question Alex. “Why did you tell Dallas you’ll stay with me?”

  “Because I will.”

  Calvin frowned. “Why?”

  “We should probably go to Kameron and tell him what happened and that we’re mates. He’ll want to know who attacked you.”

  “I don’t know who they were.”

  “No, but you do know that one of the men was the one from last time. Maybe it will help find out who he is. I’m sure you can give a description of him to Jago.”

  “Jago?” Calvin tried to remember who Jago was. He thought it was the guy with red hair, the one who worked at the retirement home in town, but there were so many pack members that he didn’t remember everyone even after living in Gillham for two months. He could be wrong.

  “He’s a painter. Have you noticed the landscapes in the dining room over at Kameron’s house?”

  Calvin had. They were beautiful, and he was envious of them every time he saw them, which wasn’t often, thankfully. He wished he was half as good as Jago obviously was, although he was more of a drawer than a painter. Or at least he had been, before he’d had to leave his house. He’d left all his supplies behind, both because he wouldn’t need them on the streets and because they would take up space he couldn’t afford to lose in his backpack. “Yeah.”

  “I’m sure he wouldn’t have problems drawing that guy, and someone in the pack has to know him. Most pack members have lived in Gillham all their lives, and even if they kept away from town, they have to know the people who live there.”

  “Yeah, okay.”

  Calvin started walking toward the path that led to Kameron’s house, but Alex didn’t follow him. Calvin turned to him, wondering what was up. “What?”

  Alex gestured at Calvin’s jacket. “You should probably go change.”

  Calvin looked down at himself. He hadn’t noticed his jacket was in as bad a shape as his clothes had been. It was bloody, and torn in a few spots. He’d changed his clothes in the infirmary because Dallas had been nice enough to go get him some while he’d been talking to Alex, but it was Calvin’s only jacket.

  He sighed. “No, we can go.”

  “You look like you were in a fight and lost it.” Alex pressed his lips together. “Right. Sorry about that.”

  Calvin shook his head and grinned. “It is what happened after all, so don’t worry about it.”

  “I still think you should get another jacket if you don’t want to scare anyone who sees you.”

  Calvin looked down again, but this time, it wasn’t to check his jacket. “I can’t, okay?” He kept his gaze on his feet, praying Alex would let go. Of course, he didn’t.

  “Why not?”

  “Because I don’t have another one. I’m lucky as it is that Dallas bought me this one when I first got here. I’m not going to ask him for money to buy another one when I wasn’t able to take care of the one I already had.”

  There was a pause, then the sound of snow crushing under boots. Calvin didn’t look up, not even when Alex touched his shoulder. Alex had to put his finger under Calvin’s chin and tilt his head up, and even then, Calvin did his best to look anywhere but at Alex. He stared at Alex’s chin and at his ear alternatively, and Alex chuckled. To Calvin’s surprise, Alex kissed his cheek.

  That got Calvin to finally look at him. He’d expected pity for his situation, maybe a hint of disgust at not having been able to take care of himself, but Alex’s gaze was soft and understanding.

  “There’s no shame in what happened to you or in anything you had to do to survive. Everyone here understands that. I understand that.”

  “But I—”

  “I’m serious, Calvin. I can’t know how you feel about this, but it doesn’t take a genius to know that you want to pay for your things yourself and that you’re ashamed of the fact that you can’t. You’re proud, and that’s fine, but it’s not a bad thing to accept help. Especially when it’s freely given. I noticed how attentive Dallas is with you. It’s almost as if you’re his little brother or something, and I don’t think he’d have problems giving you money for whatever you might need.”

  Calvin knew that, he really did, but it didn’t make it easier. “I don’t want to have to rely on him. I can’t do that to him. I don’t... we don’t know each other that well. He’s not my family. Why would he want to do that for me?”

  “Because you have a family now. You’re a pack member. You’re not alone anymore.”

  Calvin had a hard time wrapping his mind around that. He’d been alone for the past two years, and even before that, it wasn’t like he’d had a loving family.

  And now he found himself with an entire pack.

  Of course, not all of them liked him or tried to be friendly, but then he hadn’t expected that when he’d decided to come to Gillham. He’d thought he’d get some info about shifters and how to be one from Kameron before going his own way, and when he’d realized Kameron wanted him to stay, he’d thought he’d have to work hard to be accepted.

  It hadn’t gone like that.

  Dallas had stuck by him from the beginning, from the moment they’d met in that alley. He’d brought Calvin to pack territory, to the infirmary. He’d made sure Calvin was healed and had opened his own home to Calvin, even though they didn’t know each other.

  Dallas made sure Calvin ate regularly, he’d bought him clothes and everything he needed, and Calvin wasn’t sure how to repay that. He hadn’t talked to Dallas about it, because yes, he was ashamed. He also knew Dallas would probably slap him on the back of the head and tell him to shut up.

  Calvin knew Dallas wouldn’t help him if he didn’t want to, but it was hard to believe Dallas didn’t want anything for it and that he wouldn’t ask for it sooner or later.

  “Come on,” Alex said. He let his hand fall to Calvin’s side and grabbed his hand, pulling him along.

  Calvin blinked, but they were already walking to the path, and he let Alex lead him. To his surprise, they didn’t follow the path to Kameron’s house. Instead, Alex went to the left. Calvin pulled on his hand, but Alex didn’t seem to want to let go.

  “Where are we going?” Calvin asked. He didn’t think Alex would hurt him, not with what he knew about Alex and what being mates meant, but he’d been wrong before.

  “To see Nuallan and Neriah.”

  “What? Why?”

  “They’re about your size. I’m sure they have a jacket you can borrow.”

  Calvin dug his feet into the ground. “No.”

  Alex stopped and turned to look at him. “What?”

  “I said no.” If having Dallas giving him charity was bad, it was nothing next to having Alex’s friends doing it. At least Calvin knew Dallas pretty well by now, and he knew Dallas didn’t look down at him.

  “Why not?”

  “Because I don’t know them! What am I supposed to do, shake their hands and say, hey, I’m Calvin. I know we don’t know each other, but can I borrow one of your jackets? I got mine dirty with blood when I was beaten up and I’m too poor to afford to buy a new one.” Calvin swallowed. “I don’t think so.”

  Alex looked like he was trying to put his words into order. “Nuallan is my best friend.”

  Calvin wasn’t sure what that had to do with their conversation. “So?”

  “I don’t expect him to become your best friend, too, but he’s like a brother to me. That means I do expect the two of you to become somewhat close. He won’t have problems giving you what you need, if anything because you’re my mate. Besides, he was there, in the alley. He
and Neriah helped rescue you, actually. They know what you went through, and I’m sure Neriah is just waiting for an opportunity to corner you and become your friend. He already bugged me enough while you were in the infirmary.”

  Calvin didn’t know what to do with that. He didn’t think anyone ever had actively tried to become his friend.

  Alex tugged on Calvin’s hand again. “Come on. Let’s just see what happens, okay? I guarantee you that Neriah will be all over you once he sees you and your jacket.”

  Calvin knew protesting again wouldn’t get him anything, so he went. He didn’t have to actually ask for a jacket if he didn’t want to anyway.

  * * * *

  Alex kept an eye on Calvin as they walked to Nuallan’s house. He half expected his mate to bolt, what with the way he’d seemed so against asking for help from anyone.

  Calvin didn’t, though. He seemed tense, but he didn’t say anything as he followed Alex.

  The house wasn’t far, and it took them about fifteen minutes to get there, mostly because Alex made sure not to go too fast. Calvin was healed, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t still sore or in mild pain. There was no need to push him.

  There were another three small houses in the big clearing where Nuallan’s house stood. Kameron had had the houses built two by two and facing each other, and Nuallan lived in the one further away on the left. The one next to it belonged to Christian, Alex’s brother, and his mate Clea, and the one in front of their house belonged to Sei. The fourth one was still empty as far as Alex knew, and he couldn’t help that his thoughts went where they went.

  How would living with Calvin be? Would Calvin even want that? He seemed reluctant to even talk about mating, but Alex had been honest when he’d said he didn’t expect them to mate right away. He didn’t think he’d mind waiting, not even if it was for a few years, but he did hope Calvin would be ready for other stuff before that. He hoped they could date, maybe move in together, before talking about mating again. And to do that, Alex needed a place of his own.

  He couldn’t imagine Calvin moving in with him right away. Alex still lived with his parents, and while he loved them, he didn’t want to share their home, not if he was with Calvin.

  Alex had never really thought about moving out. He’d lived with his parents and brothers all his life, and it had been natural for him to continue doing that when they’d moved to Gillham. He hadn’t had a reason to move out, but now he did. Maybe he could ask Kameron about the last empty house in the clearing when they went to talk to him later.

  Alex climbed the porch steps and knocked on the door. He didn’t think Ethan was home yet, but as far as he knew, Nuallan and Neriah should be there, unless Neriah had something else planned with one of his friends. He hadn’t wasted any time getting to know people in the pack since he’d arrived. It was weird how different he was from Nuallan, even though they were brothers. Alex wasn’t exactly like either Iggy or Christian, of course, but they weren’t that different either. Nuallan and Neriah were like day and night, though, and Alex liked them both.

  Neriah opened the door. He was wearing red jeans and a black sweater. His bare feet peeked from under his pants, and he looked so fucking young. It was hard to believe he was only one year younger than Alex, and one year older than Calvin.

  “Hey,” Neriah said. His gaze flickered to Calvin and his smile widened. “I didn’t expect the two of you.” He stepped aside and gestured at the entrance. “Come on in.”

  Alex unlaced his boots and left them on the porch by the door, on the rack that was there for that reason. Calvin followed his lead, and he was close behind when Alex walked into the house.

  He noticed Neriah’s eyes widen when he saw Calvin’s jacket, and he pointed at it. “I was wondering if either you or Nuallan had a jacket Calvin could borrow.”

  “Of course we do.”

  Calvin shook his head. “It’s not necessary.”

  Neriah wrinkled his nose. “It obviously is. You can’t wear your jacket like that, and you can’t go around in sweaters until we manage to get it clean.”

  Calvin blinked. “Get it clean?”

  Neriah nodded and walked closer to him, fingering the bloodstains and grimacing. “I’m not sure we’ll actually manage to do that, but I’ll try. Blood is fucking hard to get out of clothes, though. Come on, take it off. I’ll see what I can do.” He turned toward the living room. “Nu?” he called out.

  Nuallan’s head popped out at the living room door. He blushed when he realized it wasn’t only Alex and Neriah there, but he walked to the entrance anyway. “Hey, Alex.” He swallowed heavily enough that Alex noticed it and turned to Calvin. “Hi. I’m happy to see you’re fine.”

  Calvin looked at his feet. “Yeah. Thanks, I guess.”

  God, those two were so awkward it was almost painful to watch. Alex didn’t know what they’d do if they had to entertain each other, so he stuck with them while Neriah took Calvin’s jacket from him and disappeared into the kitchen after telling Nuallan to go grab his brown jacket from his closet.

  Nuallan almost ran up the stairs, and Alex laughed.

  “Did I do something wrong?” Calvin asked quietly.

  Alex shook his head. “No. Nuallan, well, I don’t know how much you know about him and his story, but he’s not very comfortable with people, especially people he doesn’t know.”

  “Right.”

  Calvin looked uncomfortable and awkward, and Alex’s heart broke a bit. He wanted Calvin to feel relaxed with him, even though he knew it was way too soon for that, especially with Calvin’s past. Alex still wanted to do something to help, though, so he reached out and took Calvin’s hand in his. Calvin jerked, but he didn’t try to shake Alex’s hand away, so Alex stayed put and continued to stare at the top of the stairs.

  It didn’t take long for Nuallan to come back, and he blushed when he noticed Alex and Calvin holding hands. He handed the jacket to Calvin, and Alex missed the contact between them when Calvin dropped his hand. It hadn’t been much, but it had felt great, like a missing piece had clicked into place. It sounded cheesy to even think that, but Alex didn’t care.

  “You can try it on,” Nuallan said. “Neriah is about your size, although he isn’t as thin as you, so it might be a bit baggy. Not that it’s a bad thing, of course. I didn’t mean to tell you it wouldn’t look good on you, or that you’re too thin.”

  Alex laughed. “Nu, you’re babbling.”

  Nuallan snapped his mouth shut and blushed even brighter. Calvin was smiling, so he obviously wasn’t offended by what Nuallan had just told him. Alex thought he’d protest, but to his surprise, he just put on the jacket and zipped it up. He looked down at himself, then up at Alex. “So?”

  Alex was pretty sure he’d think Calvin was beautiful even if he wore a black garbage bag, but he obviously needed the reassurance, so he nodded. “You look perfect.”

  Calvin blushed and looked down. Damn, he was more similar to Nuallan than Nuallan’s own brother was. Alex didn’t mind, but he knew people were going to wonder. A lot of his friends and his mom still thought he’d been madly in love with Nuallan. They were going to have a field day with this.

  The silence in the entrance grew awkward the longer it lasted. It was obvious neither Calvin nor Nuallan were about to say anything, so Alex shook his head and yelled, “Neriah, we’re leaving!”

  “I’m not done yet!” Neriah yelled back.

  “That’s fine. Just bring the jacket over to Dallas’ house when you’re done.”

  “Okie-dokie!”

  Alex rolled his eyes. He looked at Nuallan, who was still hovering there, looking uncomfortable. “We need to go over to Kameron’s house, but I’ll come back later, okay?”

  Nuallan nodded. Alex didn’t wait for an answer—he knew he wouldn’t get one. He grabbed Calvin’s hand again and pulled him to the front door. They didn’t speak again until they were in the woods, heading toward Kameron’s house.

 
; Calvin cleared his throat. “So that was Nuallan.”

  “Yes.”

  “Your best friend.”

  “Yes.” Alex probably should tell him about what everyone thought. “I met Nuallan a few months ago. He was... a prisoner here, and I was his jailer, or at least one of them.”

  Calvin made a garbled noise. “A prisoner? He looks like he couldn’t hurt a fly even if he tried.”

  “Yeah, well, it’s complicated, but he tried to kill Kameron to save his brother. Anyway, I was friendly to him and we got closer. Then he tried to kill himself.” Alex didn’t particularly want to expose Nuallan’s secrets, but this wasn’t one. “We became even closer after that, close enough that everyone thought we were either mates or lovers.”

  “But you’re not.”

  “No. We never were more than friends. I never thought of him that way, and I’m happy he met his mate. Ethan is good for him.”

  “And you’re telling me this because...”

  “Because after Nuallan found his mate, everyone thought I’d freak out or something.”

  “Because they thought you were in love with him.”

  “Yeah. And now that I’ve found you, they might say something, or point out that you and Nuallan are kind of alike. I don’t want you to be hurt by that. I never wanted Nuallan as a lover, and while you do seem similar, I’m sure you’re not.”

  Alex saw Calvin’s lips twitch. “We’re not?”

  “If you really were, fate wouldn’t have put us together.”

  “Oh, you think fate would have put you with Nuallan?”

  “Yeah, and she didn’t, so there.”

  Alex waited, holding his breath. Calvin slowly nodded. “I guess I can see that.”

  Alex wished everyone else would, too.

  Chapter Three

  Calvin grew more nervous as they got closer to Kameron’s house. He wasn’t sure why—he knew Kameron wouldn’t have anything to say about him and Alex being mates, and he wouldn’t blame Calvin for what had happened earlier that afternoon. Meeting Alex had unsettled Calvin, though, and he hadn’t been fully settled in the first place. He felt like his life was spiraling out of control since he’d arrived in Gillham, and while he knew it was a good thing, sometimes he had a hard time wrapping his mind around everything.